Team: Andie and Jenna
Relationship: Birth Mother and Biological Daughter
Team Nickname: I’m thinking….Team Warbucks? Little Orphan Annie?

From what I can gather, Andie gave Jenna up when she was born, and they just recently reconnected. As with all teams that use the Race as a platform to get to know each other, I’m sure this will be a wildly successful venture. For those of you whose browsers don’t support <sarcasm> tags, I predict that they’ll either be booted in the first three legs or go deep but annoy the hell out of each other and us.

Team: Brooke and Claire
Relationship: HSN Co-hosts, Friends
Team Nickname: Team But Wait, There’s More!

These two will do well if there’s plenty of “sell useless goods to uninterested locals” challenges. Brooke says that her pet peeve about Claire is that “she is really bossy and gets easily offended when I don’t listen to her advice.” If there weren’t so many infomercial jokes to make about them, we might be able to focus more on their inevitable meltdowns.

Team: Chad and Stephanie
Relationship: Dating
Team Nickname: Hell…I don’t care enough about these guys to come up with a nickname.

Attractive dating couple seeks adventure, minimal fame. Likes: airport drama, phony “alliances,” Yielding teams that did nothing to them. Dislikes: each other, probably.

Team: Connor and Jonanthon
Relationship: Friends, Princeton Classmates
Team Nickname: Sheldon and Leonard

Like the cowboys before them, I predict that these guys will have a blast running the Race together, and I hope they last as long. Connor’s goal is to “beat Phil Keoghan in a foot race.” If only all the contestants were this self aware.

Team: Gary and Mallory
Relationship: Father and Daugher
Team Nickname: Kentucky

She lists her occupation as “Miss Kentucky 2009,” which I’m not entirely sure qualifies as a job. I foresee a lot of cries of “Daddy!” Then again, she says if she could switch places with anyone it’d be Phil, so I have to give her some credit for taste.

Team: Jill and Thomas
Relationship: Dating
Team Nickname: Team Corporate Synergy

Jill’s life goal is to “have an Eat Pray Love experience in life,” convenient for someone on a show that airs on a network that once owned the studio that released the movie! CONSPIRACY? I THINK….probably not. I hope her dreams are flexible, because during the Race she’ll EAT unappetizing indigenous food, PRAY that her team doesn’t wind up with a lousy cab driver, and LOVE her boyfriend…until the first time he give her the wrong directions to West Dusseldorf.

Team: Katie and Rachel
Relationship: Friends, Beach Volleyball Partners
Team Nicknames: Fake Misty May and Fake Kerri Walsh

Cute blondes with athletic builds…I think I’ve found what team my uncle Ralph will be cheering for.

Team: Michael and Kevin
Relationship: Father and Son
Team Nickname: The Wu’s

I look forward to writing “Wu, Wu, Wu, Kevin Wu!” Michael lists reading as a favorite hobby, which is good, except, y’know, race. Hope all that sitting around has prepared him to run around the world.

P.S.: I know Kenny Wu kept his stick at his waist, but I’m still convinced that could have been called high sticking.

Team: Nat and Kat
Relationship: Friends, Doctors
Team Nickname: They don’t deserve one.

Good lord, they call themselves Nat and Kat. I need to find a friend whose name rhymes with Jeff. The best I can do is…another Jeff.

Team: Rick and Nicky
Relationship: Dating
Team Nickname: Team ‘At Least They Didn’t Rhyme Their Names’

They both cite communication as an issue. Clearly, they’ve never seen the Race, because after Johnathan and Victoria, any other communication issue seems easy.

Team: Ron and Tony
Relationship: Friends
Team Nickname: I like these guys too much to insult them.

Ron is a choreographer who has been in “Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat” on Broadway. Tony is working on his doctorate. They may be my favorite team of all time.

So there you have it…the eleven teams we’ll grow to know, choose a few to love, and begrudgingly smile at when someone we hate wins.

Pilgrim (played by Michael Cera) is your typical post-adolescent adolescent. He lives across the street from the house he grew up in, plays in an untalented by inexplicably well-liked band, and dates high schoolers. Then the girl of his dreams (literally…he dreamt her up right before he met her) shows up at a party. Their first date shows promise for Pilgrim, but soon after they start dating, he learns that, in order to keep her, he has to defeat her “seven evil exes,” former boyfriends (and a girlfriend) who come at Pilgrim like he’s an avatar in some Street Fightet/Tekken/Marvel vs. Capcom mashup. As he defeats them, he learns everything they were – handsome, talented, confident – that he isn’t.

It’s difficult to categorize Scott Pilgrim, because, while it feels like a video game, it is based on a series of graphic novels by Bryan Lee O’Malley. But it almost doesn’t matter where the source material lies; the result is as good as most comic book movies and better than almost all video game movies, because it embraces both genres instead of trying to be darker or more interesting. It’s colorful, quick, and kitschy, and not in a bad way at all. The jokes, both from the evil exes and from Pilgrim’s friends (Kieran Culkin as his gay roommate and
Anna Kendrick as his sister, particularly), come a mile a minute and hit the mark every time.

The ending of the movie is a little clunky, and I’m told that the final fight scene, while played brilliantly by Cera and Jason Schwartzman, who is the head of both the evil exes and the record label Pilgrim’s band wants to sign with, loses some of the meaning it has in the books. But the film’s visual style, attitude, and overall entertainment factor hide a lot of sins, and what you’re left with is an entirely worthwhile 2 hours in the theater.

**** of 5

As Weezer has aged, they seem to have become less introspective and more “of the moment.” It seems that Weezer (Blue Album) and Pinkerton were mass therapy sessions for front man Rivers Cuomo, and singing about inattentive fathers and unrequited love provided the band with some of its best music. With his demons expelled, Cuomo turned Weezer (Green Album) into a set of formulaic but wholly enjoyable pop songs. With the passing of the years, though, it looks like Rivers doesn’t have much to look back on but his own fame.

“Memories,” like “Beverly Hills” and “Pork and Beans” before it, is about the band’s affinity for being famous and goofing around, and while one of these songs can be excused as a send up of the rock and roll lifestyle, nearly three albums’ worth of lyrics like “pissing in plastic cups before we went on stage” rings of pomposity. It’s an appropriate song title given that the band has been around for 16 years, but the content doesn’t carry any weight and instead feels like Rivers isn’t even trying anymore. That fact that he opts to speak only slightly melodically instead of actually singing doesn’t help.

I’ve excused Weezer’s downward slide for too long, going so far as to buy every full album up to last year’s Raditude, but if the band seems content to continue in this direction, I might finally be content to thank them for the memories and see my way out.

In The Other Guys, Ferrell stars opposite Mark Wahlberg as a pair of desk jockeys in the New York Police Department. Terry Hoitz (Wahlberg) aches to be on the streets but can’t after an earlier career misstep. Allen Gamble (Ferrell) is content to fill out paperwork and hero worship the over-the-top action star cops in the department (Samuel L. Jackson and Dwayne Johnson in brief but hilarious roles). But when a red-tape case that Gamble is working on develops into something more substantial, the two are thrown into the middle of the action, to Hoitz’s delight and Gamble’s terror.

The jokes in The Other Guys are funny; don’t get me wrong. Gamble is overly sensitive and tries to play therapist to Hoitz; Hoitz is baffled by Gamble’s hot wife (Eva Mendes) and history of success with women of her caliber; Gamble is so inept as a cop that his weapon gets downgraded from a handgun to a wooden gun to a rape whistle. But the jokes are repetitive. Even a potentially memorable series of exchanges between Gamble and his mother-in-law is rendered ineffective because it goes on for one trip too long.

The film might be saved by its supporting cast. Michael Keaton has an unexpected turn as the department’s captain, Steve Coogan is quite funny as the billionaire with shady connections who Gamble and Hoitz are investigating, and Rob Riggle and Damon Wayans, Jr. pitch in as B-level cops desperate to earn Jackson and Johnson’s level of fame.

Like Cop Out earlier this year, The Other Guys doesn’t use its action elements wisely and ultimately regrets it. The first and last sequences of the movie are quite funny from an action standpoint, but the rest of the movie fumbles to find a balance. Unlike Cop Out, there is enough funny on hand to cover up most of the sins.

*** of 5

Note: If you want to see the action comedy spoof at its best, check out Hot Fuzz.

As I was writing yesterday’s post on Inception and Toy Story 3, I was reminded of how incredible the last act of the latter was. Then I started thinking: what if there were awards for the best portions of a movie? In recent memory, there are several films that are great overall but have sections that border on genius. Here are some of my favorites.

Toy Story 3 – The Final Act

From the moment the toys enter the dump until the end of the movie, Toy Story 3 is one giant, brilliantly crafted sob fest. The entire movie revolves around coming to terms with age, abandonment and death, and the final scenes hit those notes over and over again. If you don’t find yourself welling up in the last half hour of this movie, I challenge your humanity.

Star Trek (2009) – The Pre-Title Sequence

A new Star Trek movie with none of the original cast (save for Spock Prime) and a director who knew nothing about the series was a major gamble. As promising as the trailers were, and as freakishly accurate as the casting was, there was still a decent chance that the movie would be below par. All of those fears were relieved in the first ten minutes. Though you don’t see the characters again for the rest of the movie, it almost doesn’t matter. The first ten minutes are like their own separate movie that could win its own award.

Wall-E – The First Act

Who knew that the best part of a “talkie” could be where there was no talking at all? The first 45 minutes or so of Wall-E are funny, charming, inspiring and emotional, and not a single human word is spoken. It almost makes the rest of the movie unnecessary. Just watch this scene and fall in love all over again.

What are some of your favorite standalone sections of movies?

On June 18, Pixar released their latest masterpiece on the world with Toy Story 3. Not only did they figure out a way to make a great sequel, but they went and topped it with a third part. I can’t remember a film series that wasn’t adapted from some other source that had such strong quality control after three movies and fifteen years. This movie had me sucked in from the first frame. The story – of growing up and trying to hold on to your childhood, of growing old and losing your connection with your loved ones – is told with remarkable emotion and maturity, especially for a “kids movie” (though we all know Pixar abandoned that label long ago). The twists are surprising, the victories are thrilling, and the lows are heartbreaking. The final half hour of the film deserves an award all on its own, and it still has me tearing up from time to time.

***** of 5

July br0ught us Christopher Nolan’s newest work, and after Memento, The Prestige and The Dark Knight, there was really no doubt that Inception was going to be good. The only detractor against the movie might have been its advertising, because the TV commercials and posters told you next to nothing about the story except that, at one point, a city folds over itself. What actually unfolds onscreen – mental experts constructing dreams for unsuspecting clients and trying to plant ideas in their subconscious – is imaginative and captivating. The movie is remarkably easy to follow, especially considering how many layers there are to the dreams as the plot progresses. The intrigue of Leonardo DiCaprio’s character trying to escape the demons he has formed after years of dream manipulation adds to the urgency of the action, and the final scene of the movie, however you want to interpret it, is a brilliant wink and nod to everything the viewer has just experienced.

****1/2 of 5

This post contains spoilers for the second season of

Last summer, I spent a not-insignificant portion of my week at the shore catching up on the HBO series True Blood. My sister and her friend were both captivated by the dark, edgy show and its portrayal of vampires, which seemed more honest to canon than the ubiquitous Twilight versions. I devoured the first season quickly and caught up on the second in time to watch it finish out in real time, spending the majority of it praying that Maryann, the godlike minotaur who co-opted Sookie’s house and brainwashed the entire town, would go away. With her killed, I thought the third season would prove more watchable.

Boy, was I ever wrong.

Allow me to quote the brilliant folks at A List of Things Thrown Five Minutes Ago to sum up why True Blood can’t be trusted to deliver good television anymore:

One friend [of Sookie's] is absent because he is busy turning into a dog to rescue his brother, who also turns into dogs, from his job, which is dog fighting; her other suitor also is missing because he’s a viking secretly carrying out a millenium-old blood feud, the present step of which involves playing best man in a coerced royal vampire wedding held in a torture-chamber basement and officiated by a veteran of the Spanish Inquisition.is suffering w

You see, True Blood was so intriguing – and so good – at the beginning because there was a struggle between vampires and day walkers, and the members of the latter group who supported (or loved) the former. You knew what the stakes were: you knew who was good and who was bad, and you were able to pick a side.

Now, we don’t just have vampires. We have werewolves, the aforementioned deceased minotaurs, shape shifters, and god knows what else. True Blood is suffering from what I’m calling Heroes syndrome, which the superhero drama contracted in its second season, where it seemed everyone and their pet gerbil had a power. When everyone is special, nobody is special, and it makes the reveal much less interesting when you find out someone has an ability. Even Sookie’s telepathy, which was lightly touched on in season one, now seems annoying.

True Blood is, and will probably remain, very popular trash television. But because they sprinkled too much of the mythical gothic fairy dust on all their characters, it has lost its interesting edge, and my attention, for more worthwhile Sunday night viewing.

Previously on the Race, the cowboys went from worst to first, which was awesome, but the WFC succumbed to whiny decision changing and were elimiated. Kind of like the real Phillies. I guess it’s cowboys or nothing.

Welcome to Malaysia. Known for making me too lazy to look up anything up about it, this was the eighth pit stop…in a racearoundtheworld. Jet and Cord get the honor of gambling on pronunciation, and it’s Singapore. They really dodged a bullet on that one. When they get to their destination, teams are to find the host of…TAR Asia? Does he do the eyebrow pop? Because if he doesn’t, that show ain’t winning any Asian Emmys.

It turns out the train to Singapore is a big bunch, which makes sense since there’s a U-Turn ahead. General dislike for the lesbians brews, which, if it continues to be a story line in this episode, pretty much foreshadows them winning.

The Half Gay Brothers find the over-energetic Allan Wu first and get the first stab at the Fast Forward, which, while totally safe, might actually terrify me. They have to ride to the top of a ridiculous ferris wheel then climb across it. No thanks. They finish it largely without incident and finish in first.

The other teams choose between rhythm, which they’re all too white to do, and selling ice cream sandwiches. The cops recognize their lack of rhythm and bail in favor of the Fast Foward, which is always a bad decision if you aren’t the first team out of the chute. Once they see that the Fast Forward is in progress, they turn back towards the detour, only to see that their cab driver has disappeared. Well, that was predictable. Once he returns, they opt to play Fudgy Wudgy men.

Back at the drum Detour, whiteness abounds and almost all the teams debate switching to the ice cream task, which the cops bang out quickly. Such As, meanwhile, finish the drum task and make their way to U-Turning the lesbi…I mean, the Road Block.

Surprise, surprise, they U-Turn the lesbians. Their bitterness in the interviews suggests that it worked.The Road Block involves counting, so people should have ample time to catch up to Such As; people like the cowboys, who finish their Detour, just as we cut to the lesbians and their continued meltdown.

You know what? I don’t care if they use white bread; I want a Singapore ice cream sammich.

Going against type, Such As finish their Road Block quickly (they wisely selected Brent to do the counting), and the task continues on mostly First In, First Out, which means that the lesbians finish the Road Block last, arrive at the mat last, and are Philiminated. Suddenly, with them gone, the rest of the teams are 50% more tolerable.

Next week: teleportation! Lasers! Just kidding…no episode next week.

Getting near the front of the plane apparently pays dividends, because the first three teams to the first route marker fly to the Island of Detours an hour earlier than the stragglers, and that first group is the Halfgay Brothers, the WFCs and Such As, and if, as Caite points out, them being first means the lesbians being kicked off the show, I’m all for it.

Both Detours involve potentially stubborn animals (tortoises and oxen), but I’d pick the one that wouldn’t kill me and that isn’t indelibly linked to the word “stubborn.” Steve and Allie agree with me, but Such As prefer to risk their lives.Then again, waking up for these people is dangerous. When they drop a coconut, the synthesizer of doom sounds, tipping us off that they’ll be penalized later in the episode. Steve and Allie finish their task quickly and adorably and taunt Such As as they pass them, making them my new favorite team, especially since the cowboys are still in last place.

When teams finish their Detour they take boats halfway to another island, and it’s only a matter of time until we get a crossover episode with LOST and the smoke monster kills a team.

Such As learn that they are one coconut short and nearly quit before heading back to get it, giving the lesbians and cops a chance to close the gap. It’s been a while since we’ve seen the cowboys, which worries me…

…and as I type that the cowboys take off, leaving a coconut behind. The synth of doom sounds again, and I’m on the verge of a breakdown.

Steve and Allie finish the leg first, making them Leg F-ing Champs. The half-gay brothers finish just behind them; meanwhile, the lesbians leave a coconut behind just as the cowboys have to turn around. Can they pull out the miracle again?

Yes and no. They make it to the Pit Stop in fifth place but leave the bottle they got at the Road Block, so they have to swim back and the lesbians check in as team number five. The cowboys….are saved by non-Philimination! Next week is not going to be easy. Come on, cowboys…I believe.

Again, I’m sure there have been many remakes that have been successful, and I’m sure that I’ve seen a remake of a brilliant British film without knowing of the original, but seems such a sin to remake such a brilliant movie so soon. See the trailer below.