Beauty and the Blogger

Just a tiny bit of shameless self-promotion this afternoon: your humble author has been cast as the latter titular role in the upcoming production of Beauty and the Beast at St. Bernadette’s Players in Drexel Hill. Rehearsals start next month; the show goes up in April. Start clearing your calendars now, because if anyone has ever seen the man behind the keyboard, they know that I’m a natural looker for the part.

Actually, We’re Quite Fond of Judaism

Any of the four of you who stopped by Movie Hawk yesterday might have noticed that we were down. That’s because, for something like the fifth time, we got hacked. Anyone who came by early enough saw a particularly offensive splash screen that might have suggested the culprit was a drunken Mel Gibson. For the record, not only do we toleraet (sic) the Jews here, we’re actually big fans of many of them. Specifically Jesus. We’ll be back by the end of the day with a quick hit and back full time tomorrow with a real post.

Bond Ambition

It’s no wonder that the producers behind Casino Royale needed to track down a younger, more athletic actor to take on the Bond franchise: they needed a 007 with stamina. After four films carried by a Bond as smooth and dry as his martinis, the series needed a shot in the arm, and there’s no better way to do that than breaking out an origin story. Featuring a 20-minute sequence where our lead agent (Daniel Craig) barely says a word while taking part in a chase for a baddie through a construction site that could be confused for a gymnastics competition, Royale sets a breakneck pace that reintroduces you to and reinvents England’s most dangerous spy. The film’s biggest problem is that it requires the same marathon training from the audience; if you want to get the most out of the new Bond, you’re going to have to sit through some significant bloat.

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Frankly, LynLyn, I Don’t Give a Damn

Welcome to Barcelona, Spain. Home to the 1992 Olympics, Barcelona is a majestic city with rich culture, beautiful landscape, and virtually nothing to make fun of. It is also apparently the tomato throwing capital of the world, but we’ll get to that later. Barcelona was the four hundred and eighty seventh (believe me, it feels like it) pit stop…in a racearoundtheworld. Last week, a bunch of bunches made up for Dustin and Kandice’s airport woes, allowing them to arrive seconds before LynLyn at the Yield. Their lack of directional fortitude got them in more trouble, though, as they arrived fourth at a Detour with only three stations and were forced to wait, landing them in last place. But the guillotine was not ready for them, as they were Marked for Elimination. Who will be the unfortunate team cast aside…next?

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Seventh Inning Stretch Marks

Until recently, TBS has been largely known as a recycling plant for dead TV shows. From Friends to Everybody Loves Raymond to bowdlerized repeats of Sex and the City, TBS has been the go-to place if you want to relive your favorite sitcoms long after they had shuffled loose the network coil. The network has finally thrown a hat of its own brand into the ring, though, offering original programming in the form of two new sitcoms: 10 Items or Less and the charming My Boys (Tuesdays, 10 p.m.).

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